


paint myself in blue and red and black and gray

by dmdys



Category: Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)
Genre: Gen, Kyle just wants to be a big brother, because he's a doctor and that's what he does, he just wants to fix things, or a little brother
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-11
Updated: 2020-06-11
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:41:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,759
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24659296
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dmdys/pseuds/dmdys
Summary: Turning her head, she looks up at the Cork pinboard on her bedroom wall. It's full of photos, mostly old ones. Well, they're not old to her. Alex's sixteenth birthday was only a year ago to her, but it's over a decade ago to her friends.
Relationships: Rosa Ortecho & Kyle Valenti
Comments: 4
Kudos: 25





	paint myself in blue and red and black and gray

**Author's Note:**

> So, we've never really had any recognition of how Kyle and Rosa feel about each other. Rosa has known for a long time that Kyle is her half brother, but Kyle didn't find out until much later, and it obviously hurt him. Even Liz recognises that he lost a sister, too, but I feel like it isn't properly addressed. He found out he had a sister, that it was someone close to him, and they were dead. He never had the chance to figure out how to be a brother or how he felt. So, this is my attempt.
> 
> Title credit to Counting Crows.

"Whatcha drawing?"

Rosa looks up from the iPad in front of her. She prefers a sketchbook and pen, but she figures she should at least try and use these new technological advancements. Plus, Liz had bought it for her, so she should at least try.

Kyle is standing in the doorway. She's sitting on her bed, Counting Crows playing lowly as she attempts to make the lines and colours replicate what she sees in her mind.

"Uh, nothing," she says, and closes Procreate. "What's up?" She freezes. "Is papi okay? Is it's his hea-"

"Woah," Kyle chuckles, holding up both hands. "I just wanted to check in on you."

Rosa eyes him suspiciously. She's been expecting this, and if she's completely honest, she's a little surprised it took him so long. It's not like Kyle Valenti to shy away from confrontation.

"Oh yeah?" She replies, and swings her legs over the side of her bed. Kyle nods, and he steps inside. It's a little amusing how comfortable he is with the room, but then again, how many times had she chased him out of it when Liz and he were dating?

"I, uh," Kyle says, looking around before sitting down on Liz's empty bed. "I was thinking we could, you know, hang out." He shrugs, a nervous smile on his lips. "Maybe catch a movie, go hiking-"

"Hiking?" Rosa laughs, Eyebrows raised. "Since when did Kyle Valenti go hiking?"

Kyle chuckles. "What can I say, I've evolved." They both fall silent. Of course he's changed, Rosa thinks to herself. Everyone has. Everyone but her.

it's been hard to wrap her head around just how different the people in her life are. To Rosa, she just woke up one day and everyone was ten years older. Everyone had suddenly jumped ahead in time and left her behind. She knows that's not really true, though; she knows it's no one's fault. Well, except Noah, some guy she had literally never actually met but who had been obsessed with her...then killed her. The very thought of him gives her a shiver and Kyle notices, but doesn't say anything.

"So? Whatd'ya think?" Kyle asks, rubbing his hands together. "We could go for a drive, catch a show in Tucson?"

"You don't have to do that," Rosa says, and she hangs her head, pushing her hair behind her ear.

"Do what?" Kyle plays dumb.

Rosa groans and rolls her eyes, looking back up at him. "You don't have to...play the..." she shrugs and sighs, looking away again. "The big brother role." She knows he's frowning, but she means it. She knew long before anyone else that they were siblings, and nothing has changed. He might not be the same homophobic douchebag that bullied Alex and made out with her sister, but he's still just Kyle Valenti. He isn't her family.

"It isn't-" Kyle begins, but cuts himself off. "I want to, Rosa."

Rosa groans and looks up, meeting his eyes. "Kyle, just drop it, okay? Nothing's changed, you don't have any obligation to me." She gets to her feet and picks up the iPad, moving to the shelves packed with sketch books and supplies. She set the iPad down and reaches for a small notebook. It's mostly lyrics she likes, some she's written herself. 

"But I do, Rosa," Kyle says, and he gets to his feet. She doesn't turn to face him, but doesn't cut him off.

"I'm not the guy you used to know," he says, and his voice wavers. "I was a dick back then, so I don't blame you for not wanting to know me, but I promise, I just want to get to know you."

Rosa chuckles lightly. She really wants to hit back with something sarcastic, tell him that she's quite alright without him. However, something inside stops her. Something is making her want to hear what he has to say.

"I know things are super frickin' weird, and I can't make up for the past or...or for you being gone for ten years, but...if I'd known-"

"If you'd known I was your sister you would have still been a tool," Rosa says, spinning to face him. "You'd still have been an asshole to Alex. You'd still have been that stupid jock who thought he was better than everyone."

Kyle pauses for a second then gives a slight nod, his face in resignation.

"You're right. I would. I would probably have been even more of a dick."

He's right, Rosa thinks. She can just imagine the things he would probably have said. He would have blamed her, blamed her mom. He would probably have claimed Helena was some succubus that lured his father away from his perfect mother. He would have blamed the undocumented immigrants for ruining his family. So, yeah. He would have been more of a dick.

"But I've tried so hard to change, Rosa." Kyle continues. "I'm a doctor! My literal occupation is to care for people." He takes a breath. "When my dad-" He pauses. "When...when dad was sick, my whole world fell apart." His voice goes low. "Liz was gone, everyone was busy growing up, and I was stuck here, watching our father die and I couldn't do anything to help him."

"He's _not_ my father." Rosa hits back, tossing her notebook onto her bed. "He's not-"

"No, he's not." Kyle agrees. "Arturo is your father. Nothing can take that away from you, or from him. And he's the best damn father you could have asked for."

Rosa swallows, and crosses her arms. She wasn't expecting that.

"But biologically, you are my sister-"

" _Half_ -sister."

"You're my sister." Kyle says determinedly. "And I'm not that dickbag jock from high school anymore. I'm a grown man, and I actually care about the people around me." He sighs, bites his lip and looks away. It's a few seconds before he speaks again. "I...I can't make up for the things I did back then, and I'm truly sorry." He looks up at her. "You all have your own reasons to hate me." His eyes widen. "Especially Alex."

Rosa nods. "Yup." 

"But I'm trying, I really am." He looks up to meet her eyes again. "I'm trying with Alex, and I want to try with you. Ten years ago I might have not given a damn about having a secret sisters, but that guy doesn't exist anymore. It's 2020, Rosa, and I want to..." He let's out a weak laugh. "I want to know my big sister!"

Even Rosa can't hold back a laugh. She looks barely older than sixteen, never mind actually being nineteen...well, nineteen in the mind...and body...but twenty-nine by technicallity.

"I don't expect you to just accept me," Kyle continues, and he starts towards the door. "But I want to try, Rosa. When I found out...when I found out that you were my dad's, it felt like you'd died again." He swallows. "I know you hated me, but I did care about you. I loved you. You were Liz's sister."

Rosa looks down at her feet. New Converse boots from Isobel. Too clean and shiny. She needed a Sharpie to fix that.

"When you came back...it was like a second chance. Like this was the universe giving me the chance to fix the things my dad couldn't."

Rosa bites her lip. Kyle has his back towards her, but he isn't leaving. She can tell he's struggling. She remembers the first time she met Jim Valenti. Well, not the actual first time, but the first time she met him as her father. She'd yelled and punched, drunkenly screaming about her life being ruined and what this could do to Liz...and he'd just let her. He let her blow off all her steam, call him all the names and insults under the sun. Then he'd held her. He'd just held her and let her cry. Let her tell him she wasn't his, over and over again. Let her tell him he'd never be Arturo, and cursed him and her mother. He'd just _let her_. Like he wanted to show her in any little way that, whilst he didn't raise her, he still loved her. He'd never be her real father, but he would always be there if she ever needed him.

"I'm sorry," Kyle says, and Rosa is pulled from her thoughts. "I shouldn't be bothering you, you're still recovering, I'll let-"

"There's an indie show in Albuquerque next Saturday," Rosa cuts him off, and he turns to face her, Eyebrows raised. "It's like, art and music, and Liz can't make it, so..." She trails off.

Kyle smiles at her, and she can almost feel the glow of hope beaming from him.

"We could, uh, make a day of it, grab some food or something." Rosa finishes.

Kyle nods, still grinning. "I'd like that."

Rosa nods, and unfolds her arms. They stand in an awkward silence for what is probably only seconds but feels like hours. Rosa finally speaks up, "I should get back to-" she waves her hand at the discarded note book.

"Oh!" Kyle nods, still smiling. "Yeah, sure. Sorry!" He laughs, and straightens his jacket. "I'll, uh, I'll text you."

Rosa nods, and returns the little wave her throws her way as he leaves.

Once Kyle has gone and she's seen him cross the street through the window, Rosa allows herself to fall on her bed. _What am I doing?_ She thinks. She doesn't need another sibling. Liz is all she needs. 

Turning her head, she looks up at the Cork pinboard on her bedroom wall. It's full of photos, mostly old ones. Well, they're not old to her. Alex's sixteenth birthday was only a year ago to her, but it's over a decade ago to her friends. Her eyes fall on a photo of the cafe. Her old friends are all there, smiling or laughing. Alex is grinning as Maria laughs at whatever they'd been talking about; Liz has her arms around their dad, pressing a kiss to his cheek as he tries to balance milkshakes; and Rosa is there, legs crossed as she sits on a table, guitar in her hands, a smile on her open mouth as she sings. Then there's Kyle Valenti, leaning against the table next to her, smiling and watching her as she sings.

Leaning up on her elbows, Rosa stares at the photograph. Everyone has changed so much. Maybe it's time she did as well.


End file.
